Sunday, September 28, 2014

Half way through my 2WW!

We have just under one week until we will find out if our 2nd IUI worked or not. Last time I thought and felt so much happening and thought that is was me getting pregnant, not so much the case though. This time I didn't have any cramping or anything, and have felt nothing so far, so I am hoping the change means good things.

I have been able to keep much busier this time around as I am back at work. I teach 8th grade, all subjects to 24 students. We keep extremely busy, when I am not with them I am planning for them. I have been trying to get to my planning during the week so that I can have my weekend to myself and my husband, so I can clean, and rest up for a new week. I haven't even had much time to think about the what ifs and if a twinge was implantation. :)

I have given thought to, and have for sometime, if my husband and I would ever "come out" about our infertility. Right now, less than 10 know about our struggles. We told my Mother in law first at about 8 months when my sister in law became pregnant with her third, at the time she was not concerned, but now is becoming more aware of our struggle and how hard it is. Next, I told my sister and cousin, for support and because my cousin went through it. Then we told my sister and brother in law at a year, they have been supportive. Other than that just our bosses know due to appointments. I am a passionate person and love to support things I have a strong belief in, so I would want to become involved in support of bringing knowledge to those who don't know or understand infertility.

Sometimes I wish those who we were close with would ask us about it, how it was going, etc. It seems like we always have to bring it up, and sometimes it would be nice to be asked how we are doing. Though, I know people probably don't do that because they don't want to hurt us. So, it is a double edged sword.

I started this blog as a way of keeping track of everything, so I have a record for the future. I don't publish it to social media, or share with those I know. I hope that one day perhaps I will be able to share it though, so others know the many prayers, thought, and hope went into bringing home our little one....when that happens, however that happens.

I know I probably have a ton of errors written here, too tired to edit though, and for tonight, I just wanted to get my thoughts down. Hopefully in a week we will have wonderful news!

Thursday, September 18, 2014

IUI #2

Seems I don't have much time to write these days now that I am back in school teaching. We did IUI number 2 today. We had two follicles, one 30mm and the other 18 we are praying with all that we are. So far I am feeling really well, last time I had crazy bad I don't know what is different about this time. :) Here is hoping for a miracle!

Sunday, September 7, 2014


Well, my cycle has finally rolled around again after the IUI. Back story....we did our first IUI in August. We had 3 beautiful follicles, my husband's sample was awesome too, but no baby. I didn't end up getting a good period after the IUI, but no cysts so that was good. I was given the option to go ahead and start the femara again (to grow follicles) or take a rest cycle because my uterus lining was thick and even if everything did happen as it should the baby might not implant into a thick uterus. We decided to ask the doctor if we could go ahead a take provera to give me a good period right then and there, the opposite would have been to wait 35 days then take the provera and wait another 2-3 weeks to get a period, and we didn't want to waste time. We figured pregnancy has never happened on our own yet, so taking the rest cycle really wouldn't help us get to our goal, and make me irritated having to wait for a period that wouldn't come.

So, yesterday my period started a whole week earlier than I thought it would, so that is good news. I will call my doctors office tomorrow to make sure we are on track to start another cycle of the medication.

Here is hoping and praying for a great cycle!

Wednesday, August 20, 2014


So sad this morning. It seems out first IUI failed. I don't know what to do, how to pray.

Friday, August 8, 2014

More Answered Prayers and our 1st IUI

After sharing every detail of the good news with my husband the other night regarding our waiting follicles we debated going for an IUI (inter-uterine insemination) or trying ourselves. We weighed the pros (this might be the step that will get us our baby) and the cons (it isn't cheap) and decided that I am still on Summer break and it might be the best time because I am still relaxed and can be calm the next couple weeks while we wait, so we decided to go for it.

It was a good thing too, since it was already scheduled, and I wouldn't have to call to cancel it. Wednesday evening I gave myself the trigger shot (induces ovulation), which was simple and quick. Yesterday we were filled with prayers as my step grandmother passed away and my husbands grandfather had to go into surgery to remove a mass from his back, which is probably cancerous, and of course for our upcoming IUI.

My specific prayers were that my husband would be able to give a good sample for the procedure and that it wouldn't hurt too much when the procedure was done on me. I was very concerned because a previous fertility procedure was very painful. Of course, I also prayed that this IUI would be the start of our family.

Just as I had prayed, my husband's sample was perfect and very good. The procedure on me was also almost painless, the nurse was very careful. So, more prayers answered! We won't know the outcome of the last prayer for a couple more weeks though, but you better believe we will continue to pray.

After the procedure today I went to a yard sale at my favorite place in Coopersville. At this house they collect old trinkets and frames, desks, chairs, and just about anything that can be turned into something cute. I was able to get a jar for a classroom project for .25. I also picked up a wooden sign that said BAKERY on it and the tiniest, little dutch tea set which sits on a shelf by the kitchen sink.

So, besides a little cramping I am doing well, and feeling hopeful.


Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Good News and Prayers Answered

We pray every single day for God to give us a miracle. I have prayed many times throughout the day, and nothing for almost a year and a half. Maybe not nothing, maybe wait, be patient. 

Last night was no different. We prayed as we always do and went on about our day. Last night as I laid in bed eagerly anticipating this morning's doctor appointment I again pleaded with God and told him how much we would love to be blessed with a baby to call our own and to raise in his image. I prayed specifically for 3 follicles (the sacks that hold the eggs) just the right size! I know it seems weird for being that specific but I figure maybe that is what he wants to hear. 

This morning as I drove to Grand Rapids and as I waited anxiously in the waiting room of the fertility center I was so nervous. So nervous that there would be another cyst or just nothing at all. 

As I looked at the ultrasound screen and saw a big black dot I got so excited! The nurse said it was 20mm, perfect size, and then another one that would be too small. As the other side showed on the screen I saw two more black dots, 2 more follicles. I asked for their size and she said 17mm and 16mm, just about perfect size! So we have 3. That was exactly what my prayers were for. 

I think the doctor and nurse could sense my excitement, as I was beaming from ear to ear! We then scheduled the next steps...which also come with decisions that I will have to make with my husband tonight. The whole drive home I just smiled so much! 

Perhaps this is God saying now is the time, I hope it is, I will continue for his will to be done in our lives. I will continue to pray my hardest that now would be the time for our blessing to come into our life. 


Thursday, July 31, 2014


On Monday I went back to see my doctor. She would decide if the cyst went down enough to continue with fertility treatments. I knew it would be a long shot that we would get pregnant in July due to cyst, but nonetheless I still got pretty upset with the negative test on Sunday evening. Sunday night as I lay in best, mind racing, I called out to God. Don't get me wrong, we pray every single day for God to bring us a miracle. Sunday night though I was so upset, so upset that he hasn't answered our prayer in almost a year and a half. So I pleaded, I asked God to please help us, that my body would have shrunk the cyst so that we could continue with treatment.

Back to Monday. I was so nervous as I drove the 40 minutes to the fertility center. I remember walking through the hallway of the women's health center to the elevators, having to take deep breaths to make it into the elevator and to the third floor where my Fertility office is at. I quickly checked in and took my seat in the waiting room. I picked up a magazine which featured the Prince William and his beautiful boy George and talked of plans for another royal baby. Of course I thought, hmmm they should look at the cover before placing such magazines on the table in a fertility center. Within a few short moments I was called to go back for my appointment.

My doctor was pleased to see my uterus was doing well and that my cyst had went completely away. So, she gave the okay to continue with our plan. That morning I went to the pharmacy to pick up more medicine to help me out and tomorrow will be the last dose, then waiting till next week to see if it helped!

We are thinking about having an IUI- inter uterine insemination done if the news is good at the doctor next week. It would be a good time to have it done as I am still on vacation and can rest and am the least stressed of the year right now. We will pray about it and try to figure out God's plan for us.